In case you missed it, that's the title of the column we've all been waiting for since columnist Bill Ervolino went oiling with Jane over a month ago. The column appeared in the Bergen Record, on May 15, and you can read it here.
Here's an excerpt:
It was a damp, chilly day, and Morales had pinpointed three nests of eggs we could oil around the pond behind 445 Godwin Ave. With us were her husband, Luis, and Ben Mena, another Midland Park resident and Geese Peace volunteer.
Together, we tiptoed into the quiet woods around the pond in search of nests, trudging through mud and thorny bushes like Elmer Fudd, huntin' wabbits.
I was carrying a bottle of corn oil and a cobalt blue umbrella. Mena had his own umbrella and a pair of nasty-looking pliers. I knew the umbrellas are used to scare the parents away from the nest. But ...
"Pliers?" I whispered.
"In case one of the geese bites you," Mena replied. "I'll need them to pry the bill off your leg."
"Terrific," I murmured, as another errant branch hit me in the face."
Mud and muck? Goose bills clamped onto your legs? Errant branches hitting your face? Poison ivy? Black bears? Bring it on!